Co-sleeping...touchy subject I know.
However, in my opinion, co-sleeping with your baby is Heaven. I'm an advocate of it 100%. My son, who will turn three at the end of July, has been sleeping with me since birth. When in the hospital, I chose not to leave him in the nursery. I requested that he be in my room at all times unless otherwise medically necessary.
And when he arrived home, I knew that instinctively I wanted him to be as close to me at all times as humanly possible. Infants are utterly helpless. They need their mother (or care giver) around the clock. Therefore, I thought it was insanely natural to have my son sleep with me, and according to the information I've read on the subject, it is. So much so, that I didn't even purchase a crib. I didn't add a crib to my registry and I instructed all my close family members to not even be on the look out for a crib, I flat out didn't want one.
I enjoy my son being close to me, even now as he gets ready to turn three. He's still helpless and he needs his mommy.
I adore the smell of my son and the way he nestles into the crook of my arm when it's nap time and bedtime. I love crawling into bed at night after I have put my son down and pulling him close to me so that we can cuddle and become as close as safety allows.
If you're a new mother and you may be worried about any dangers associated with co-sleeping, I direct you to Natural Child , Mothering, or CoSleeping.org. Those three websites will give you all the research and statistics associated with the topic.
I can also tell you, as a mother who co-sleeps with their child, that when my son was a newborn I hardly changed positions while sleeping. This wasn't done deliberately. Your natural mothering instincts take precedence. You know your newborn is sleeping next to you, and for me, that was enough to tell my body not to move. It may sound like it was uncomfortable, but I can assure you it was not. I found it amazing that the exact position I went to sleep in, was the same one I woke up in. I'm sure this doesn't happen for all moms, but in my case, it did.
The benefits of co-sleeping are tremendous for me and my son. He was never a sound sleeper and he woke up quite often throughout the night until he was about two, and maybe a little older. He would wake up to eat, or reach for his pacifier that fell out of his mouth, or simply to nuzzle closer to mommy. It was so much easier to lull him back to sleep with him right next to me, and he slept for longer periods of time when he was an infant. And that meant that mommy got to sleep decently as well. Sometimes, we could go up to four hours before he wanted to eat again. And I see that even today, when he wakes, he is extremely well rested from getting a full nights sleep.
While co-sleeping may not appeal to all mothers, it worked for me and my son. If I have another child, I will absolutely co-sleep with them as well. And when I feel the time is right, I will transition my son into his own room and bed. But for now, there's nothing more sublime then taking in the smell of my son, or feeling his drool land on my arm, or even allowing for the faint sound of his little snores to help lull me to sleep.
Please, share your motherly outlook on co-sleeping. I'd love to hear your side of the story.
5 comments:
Count me as a Yay. I never intended to co-sleep -- in fact, I don't think I put much thought into it all; I just assumed the baby would sleep in a crib, 'cause that's what babies do, right? But almost as soon as we got home from the hospital, I realized that my son, that little, tiny, helpless newborn, had an innate NEED to be next to me. If we put him down on the bed, he'd somehow find a way to squirm over so that he was smack-dab next to me. And he slept better like that too. So did I.
Every single one of my children has slept beside me, at least for the early months and very often for a year or longer. (They all transitioned out on their own).
Here in WI, though, there has been a rash of mothers/caregivers inadevertently smothering their infants in their sleep -- so much so that some are thinking of banning co-sleeping. But in every single case, mom or caregiver was drunk &/or high.
Blame the substances and blame the parenting, but don't blame co-sleeping.
Boy, I don't know. I know you asked for mommies to comment, but I'm a daddy. I hope it's okay for me to comment.
I was going to mention the string of deaths here in Wisconsin, but Jennifer beat me to it.
I'm actually on the fence with this one. There are pictures in our albums of me, asleep on the bed or couch with one or both of my twins. It's different because, obviously my wife was taking the picture. So it wasn't as though there was no one awake at the time.
Ultimately we prefer to have our bed to ourselves. But I cannot say that I think co-sleeping is deadly. I do believe it can be a risk. Especially for first time parents. Having a newborn can be exhausting. Substance abuse or not, there can be some serious sleep deprivation.
Our first were twins. We had to establish a routine that would allow me to function at work. I don't think co-sleeping would have worked for us.
With number four, our situation is different. Noah is sharing a room with his sister. So he gets up in the night and crawls into bed with mommy and daddy. We allow this because it would not be fair to Natalie to keep her up by letting him "cry it out" in his own bed.
In our situation, sacrificing self and relationship for our children nearly led to the implosion of our relationship and the dissolution of our marriage.
I am not against co-sleeping. But it is not for us. I think it is a decision based on each individual situation.
When my boys were first born, they slept in the bed with me every night. Until about 5 months old. Now that they are older (4 and 2) I believe they should sleep in their own beds unless sick or scared. As much as I love laying with them, I believe it is important for them to learn to self soothe and learn to be one their own. That being said, I don't think their is anything wrong with co-sleeping unless is progresses into their school years.
I'm 100% for it, I'm glad to have come across this post, it reassures things for me. Congrats on your baby son turning three :)
Count me as yah.
I did so with both my daughters and we are closer for it (they are 4 and 2 now.)
They sleep in their own room that they share, but they are confident to come and rest with me if they feel the need to.
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